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millenniumfalcon.com • View topic - Official "I've seen it and I want to unload" Thread
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Post Posted: May 5th 2005 3:07 am
 

Join: April 25th 2004 8:34 pm
Posts: 577
Hey all, caught a media-screening of the movie today, here's a full review, detailed, and including some spoilers:


Star Wars - Revenge of the Sith will be remembered for one thing, and it's not what you would expect.

Revenge of the Sith opens up with a HUGE space battle. You've heard this (if you've been visiting spoiler sites) but I can't get across how EPIC this opening scene is. The CG work is seamless, as our "hero's" Obi-wan and Anakin Skywalker sour through exploding ships, HUGE cruisers and god knows what else the come across. It's huge - visually stunning and you can tell a lot of time was spent on this.

We close in on our focus characters for the movie, with Obi-Wan and Anakin piloting their ships towards a huge capital ship, which has inside the very snide, weasel-like General Grievous - who is milked for all his CG worth into, minding the language, "chicken-shit" star wars character, one who'd rather run away from a fight, or send others in to do his dirty work than face the battle himself. He's cool - not as cool as I had expected but still, something different for the universe we know and love.

Another quick scene as Obi-Wan's ship crash lands (after being attacked by "Buzz-Droids" who basically chew apart his ship, droid and whatever else the come across) and he and Anakin leap into action aboard the Generals ship.

We have some neat scenes here, involving the much loved R2D2 who gets a more "action" role in the opening scene, helping dispose of a couple of Battle Droids (think, oil and fire) as well as a running semi-joke involving a lift, and our "hero's" trying to make it to the Generals Quarters to save Chancellor Palpatine, who has been locked away their by the evil Count Dooku.

After some mix-ups with R2 and some dangerous moments, Obi-Wan and Anakin arrive in time to save the Chancellor - only to be met with Gusto by Dooku, who getting barely any lines (much like his disposed of 'use' in the Third LOTR installment, Christopher Lee is sorely underused) quickly gets into a Lightsaber duel with our hero's. Again, much more action than Episode II in this regard, Obi-Wan gets trapped during the battle under a ledge and he's left to battle Anakin, who is shown to be FAR more powerful this time around, and with the quick flick of a lightsaber the Counts hands are removed there's a nice moment here, as Palpatine suggests that Anakin kill Dooku "It's not the Jedi way" we're told, but in a flash we have our first decapitation of the film and the opening to Episode III begins.

I say Begins, because after this HUGE opening, it's now (unfortunately) downhill for the moment as we're subjected to a fairly mis-directed attempt at keeping the action heavy, as we now get our hero's captured by Grievous, and taken to the control room of the ship. Some nice lines from Obi-Wan, and of course the inevitable "save" from R2 at the last moment, as the Jedi-Knights cut down droids and Neomodians protecting the General, only to have the VERY cowardly General, escape through a broken window, running out the ship back into it again and escaping (ala "A New Hope's" escape by Threepio and R2) in the ships escape pod.

This little scene introducing the General aside, I thought was poorly done, although having some nice action moments, after a piling on a HUGE opening space battle, a lightsaber duel then some MORE lightsaber action (with Grievous' cool-armed bodyguards, who can fight with their heads removed no less!) it just was almost too much the audience needed a breath but it didn't come

The Generals ship breaks apart, and we now head into the atmosphere of Coruscant (where the battle is taking place) and Anakin and Obi-Wan pilot the ship into crash-landing on the surface of the planet. Sounds interesting when writing it down, but it's miss-able and pointless our first "un-intended laughter" moment occurs as flying fire-trucks turn up to put out the flaming ship as it lands - baffles me as to why Anakin was able to find the (only seemingly) vacant space of land on the entire planet of Coruscant and yet, fire trucks need to put out a burning ship?

The ship crashes, and our hero's have saved the Chancellor, and the day the audience get a much needed CGI-break, and there's a nice moment between Obi-Wan and Anakin as he suggests he go and play 'politician' for a while, and accept being the 'hero' of the hour.

Soppy scenes ensue, with Anakin meeting Padme in the shadows, as we learn she is pregnant with Anakin’s child has been missing him greatly (you get the picture) and Anakin has a typically male moment as he realizes what it means to bring a child into the intergalactic world.

I'm a little unsure of the order of scenes that occur next, because there are SO many. This is a very poorly edited section of the film, as we chip and chop between various scenes of importance to non-interest all introducing some basic plot-points there's also some AWFUL wipes used here by Ben Burtt shameful, and very un-star wars.

I believe next we get to see the General escaping back to the planet Utapu, where the council of separatists have convened, we see he has survived the opening battle and that’s really about it. He gets a message from the Dark Lord Sidious, of which I completely forget what it was about but was basically "stay put, you'll get yours" and we're back to Coruscant.

We have a "dream" sequence, where someone (we find out it's Anakin) sees Padme die in childbirth, Anakin wakes up and storms off He goes to Yoda, who explains fear of loss is a pathway to the dark side, he needs to learn to "Let go of ones he loves" and this is a fantastic scene, and well "acted" by Yoda (if you can call it that).

Padme catches up with him and they talk about his dream. We get the sense here Anakin has been regularly hiding moments of the war from her all is not well, but Anakin IS very much in love with her. I think we're supposed to get the idea that Jedi cannot handle the concept of love; it becomes an addiction one they cannot control. Anakin has a duty to perform, but he is clouded by his love for Padme. Everything relates to her. Everything he does is for her. Essentially, the point is he is OBSESSED with her, loving her and all that entails. To the "average" Joe person, that’s fine for a JEDI, it is clearly different which is obviously why Jedi are not allowed to fall in love.

Either way, we move back to the Senate chambers, where Palpatine informs Anakin that he is going to put him on the Jedi Council as his "informant" - Anakin is pretty wrapped with this, and we move now to the Jedi Council, where basically Mace, Obi-Wan and Yoda flat out deny Anakin the rank of Master. "Sit DOWN " is a nice line from Mace, as he Samuel L Jackson owns Anakin. We learn that battles are raging throughout the galaxy, they're trying to track the General down and Yoda believes that he "could" be somewhere in the outer-rim. There is a battle on the Wookie Planet where they need Jedi-assistance, and "I have great relations with the wookie's" utters Master Yoda (un-intentionally funny moment two). So they decide to send Yoda to the Wookie homeworld to help out with the battle there, while they continue their search for Grievous.

Understandably, Anakin is pretty annoyed that he can't be given the rank of Master, Obi-Wan explains to us that he has trained Anakin since he was a boy, that he is proud of him and needs to learn patience which Anakin doesn't have. He needs everything now he WANTS everything now and believes he is better than everyone else, which essentially he is just again, doesn't know how to control it. Obi-Wan asks Anakin to return Palpatine's favor of spying on the Jedi For him, by Spying on Palpatine. Very confusing for us and Anakin, basically we're told this is "Not the Jedi Way" by Anakin, who seems dismayed by Obi-Wan and the Jedi

We move back to another dream (again, there were SO many scenes in this section of the movie it's hard to remember the order of them all, so forgive me if I'm wrong) of Padme dying, this time Obi-Wan is seen with her We find out Anakin is really worried, and lets on to Padme finally, that he is going to try to save her whatever he can do. She suggests he talks to Obi-Wan, but he (I assume because of the dream and his suspicious mind) decides not to.

We now have Yoda arriving on the Wookie Planet as the war begins to start up there this is an absolutely AWESOME sequence, of which is sorely cut to it's "bare" bones evidently (and lets face it, it's hard to have exposition of the battle with a small foot-high green Jedi and walrus-speaking 7ft tall walking carpets) so although there’s (uncomfortably) no dialogue, it's a nice battle-opener and cool to see Wookie’s fighting it out with Clone Troopers

Next, we have Anakin arriving at some form of dance/opera although that’s not really covered much. He joins Palpatine and they begin to talk about the Dark side and how it can save peoples lives. (Cue Anakin gaining interest in this because of Padme). It's painfully obvious Palpatine is pulling every string in this whole thing it's beautiful and Ian McDiarmid has stolen the show up until this point. Well performed, and he has some great lines. Palpatine lets Anakin know that he's found the General, and he needs to tell the Jedi, but be warned because he thinks they're plotting to take over the senate, and turn their back on him. Anakin rightly doesn't believe this, but Palpatine has poisoned his ear enough. Anakin also is suspicious know because of Obi-Wan asking him to spy on Palpatine.

Everyone has an agenda is this movie, and Anakin is the pawn of them all. The Jedi are made out to look as suspicious and as manipulative as Palpatine and the Sith. It's confusing for sure, and shows how far the Jedi have fallen into chaos during the 'Clone Wars'.

The key thus far (again, may have some scenes out of order) is that Anakin has been asked by all sides to do their work. The Jedi, are essentially bumbling around not able to see what is right in their face, and because of this they SUSPECT the Chancellor (Palpatine) is somewhat to do with this, but because they don't act in aggression (it's not the Jedi Way) the get ol' Anakin to do their work. All the while, Palpatine is playing that card telling Anakin the Jedi will turn on the Republic for themselves and all poor ol' Ani is worried about, is Padme dying - his arrogance doesn't give a shit about anyone else just Padme, and keeping her alive

We leave the opera scene, and we have Anakin letting the council know that Palpatine has found the General on Utapau (on the outer rim as well somewhere) - Yoda and Mace don't trust Anakin, so they deny the Chancellors request to send him, and instead send Obi-Wan to track down, and kill the General.

We move back to Anakin visiting Padme again, letting her know he loves her she suspects something is going on with him, he lets her know he's "Not the Jedi I should be " he wants more, he wants power but he's worried about Padme and will do anything to stop her dying. He goes to visit Palpatine who lets him know that the Jedi will move against him soon, and tells Anakin of and old Sith-Story about "Darth Plagueis the Wise" who learned to create life, sustain life and stop people from dying. He "Taught his apprentice everything, which is ironic considering he could stop others from dying, but couldn't save himself from being killed (gravelly voice) IN HIS SLEEP"

Very nice scene again from McDiarmid Anakin ignites his saber and figures out Palpatine is the sith lord he now has a choice, save Padme from dying with the knowledge of the Sith, or tell the Jedi who is the Sith Lord, and watch Padme die. Confounding this, is his friendship of the Chancellor and suspicion of the Jedi, Mace and of course ol' Padme and her Baby.

We now fade to black, with Obi-Wan arriving on Utapau, learning that Grievous has taken everyone hostage, and he decides to go track him down on a bird-like Lizard. Pretty good CG here, much better than Anakin riding that other weird animal during Episode II - and it has this VERY cool bird-call sound effect it does every few seconds, which is cool. So Obi-Wan rides off to find the General, as he informs a Stormtrooper, that they can arrive on the planet soon, and help dispose of all the separatists there.

We cross back to Anakin informing Mace Windu, that Palpatine is a Sith Lord Mace tells Anakin to go wait in the Jedi Council room, as he and 3 other Jedi go to take down Palpatine. They arrive in Palpatine’s senate room, and a lightsaber battle ensues. Again, all the scenes before were poorly edited together, and now we're BEGGING for some action, instead of "talking heads". Very nice lightsaber dueling, as the (now Sith Lord exposed) Palpatine, takes care of the 3 other useless Jedi cannon fodder, and duels with Mace for a bit, breaking a HUGE glass window as Mace gets the best of Palpatine and has him ready to Kill. Meanwhile, Padme looks out her window, Anakin looks out his Padme looks out hers Anakin senses her and decides that actually, the Jedi and Yoda don't know shit about loosing someone he loves and he's going to go save his friend Palpatine, thus he runs off and finds a shuttle.

Meanwhile, we're back to Mace and Palpatine, who starts frying our Shaft-Jedi with blue lightening but Mace is too strong, and it ends up frying Palatine’s boyish good looks (hence why he looks like a raisin in Episode VI) Anakin turns up, tells Anakin he is too weak and that the Jedi are trying to overthrow the republic HORRIBLE scene between Palpatine and Mace as they essentially say to each other "no he's the bad guy no HE is no HE is" basically that. It's terrible. And takes you WAY out of the moment (with even flashes of Gollumn-esque screams from Palpatine it's quite bad..).

Anakin now has a choice, who does he believe the Jedi who bummed him out and didn't make him a Master, or the Chancellor who he knows is a Sith Lord, but (in the grand scheme of things) has been FAR more honest with him than the Jedi then it hits home. Save Padme, or not he chooses Palpatine, and slices off Maces hand with his Saber (which stops the horribly acted "no You’re the bad guy no HE's the bad guy" scene and Mace essentially goes "oh shit" and Palpatine, who's been faking his weakness fries Mace like Bacon with Blue lightning, and he plummets out the window to certain doom.

Poor Anakin, now realizes what he's done and Palpatine creeps back into Slimy-Sith Lord mode, and announces that Anakin has made the right decision and they can now both restore peace to the Galaxy. Anakin begs Palpatine to tell him how to save Padme, he will in return Anakin becomes his apprentice "You will now be know as Darth Vader, Lord of the Sith". Palpatine says the Jedi have turned on their republic, whether Anakin believes this or not at this stage isn't important I get the feeling that Anakin now has ONE sole focus, and that is Padme, the Jedi are irrelevant to him now .to save Padme, he has to find out how through Palpatine. So because he is selfish, power-hungry and impatient this is a means to and end.

We cross now to Yoda, who senses something is up with Anakin as the battle rages on the Wookie planet (for all 45sec) then we cross back to Obi-Wan, as he continues his pursuit of General Grievous. He's found him, and leaps into battle just as the Clone Troopers arrive to help him out. Ol' Grievous is a huge metallic pussy, and runs off on some speeding wheel bike as Obi-Wan makes Chase, tracks him down and they battle lightsaber-to-4-armed-Grievous-lightsaber and Obi-Wan makes easy work of him, then Grievous gets the upper hand as Obi-Wan looses his lightsaber over the side of the ledge throwing Obi-Wan to certain doom over the same ledge .but he clings on Grievous walks over to finish him off, Obi-Wan force-grabs a gun, shoots Grievous in the Guts and possibly the coolest moment of the movie, as Grievous catches on fire, his guts explode in fire and his whole face begins to burn and he dies.

We're back to Palpatine and Anakin, as he says to restore "peace" to the galaxy, he has to now go a planet called Mustafar, and wipe out all the remaining separatists not before, however Palpatine gets rid of the Jedi Anakin is sent to the Jedi Council with an Army of Stormtroopers to take out all remaining Jedi, while Palpatine (Now Darth Sidious in all true-form wrinkly and gravel-voiced) issues "order 66" to all the stormtroopers throughout the Galaxy which essentially means, the Jedi are the Enemy, kill them.

To be continued


Post Posted: May 5th 2005 3:07 am
 

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This is the moment I was talking about earlier. Star Wars - Revenge of the Sith will be remembered for THIS one moment, this is what will make your gut wrench. The scenes of the Jedi-Purge across the Galaxy. Absolutely, heart wrenching. Breathtaking CGI and FANTASTIC SCORE from John Williams, as the music is turned up loud and Anakin Marches towards the Jedi Temple, we have scenes from across the galaxy from various worlds as many high-profile Jedi meet their doom at the hands of the now order-66 controlled Stormtroopers it's heartbreaking. It really is.

Anakin walks into the Jedi Council as a cute-as-buttons little Jedi walks up and asks "Master Anakin" what to do. Anakin ignites his lightsaber the Female Audience in my screening literally went "oh fuck" loudly and we cut to Yoda who drops his walking stick and we have the first ever star-wars moment, where Yoda deserves an Academy Award for the look on his face.

Just. Amazing.

It's the moment of the movie for me and it will twist your gut. You realize now, Anakin will do anything to save Padme. Absolutely. Anything. Yoda now realizes this from half-way across the galaxy. The clones start to turn on Yoda, but he bests them with a couple of lightsaber-induced decapitations (I forget what the count is now there's a drinking game in this movie for it, that’s for sure. Take a shot each time someone looses their noggin) We have a pained look on Yoda's face and we cut to Obi-Wan.

Just as he gets his lightsaber (which fell over the ledge in his battle with Grievous remember? that’s why he used the Gun. "How Uncivilized" that was the line) the clones receive the order from Palpatine, and Obi-Wan bites the dust from Gunfire, plummets down the HUGE Utapu sinkhole, and with a splash that’s the end of Obi-Wan or is it?

We cut to Padme, watching out her window the Jedi Temple, burning in the distance she begins to cry, and Anakin turns up. she's worried about him, because of the fires he says not to worry, the Jedi have turned on Palpatine but it's all good, he's saved the day Padme does her "What the?.." moment, and Anakin informs her, that he has to go wipe out all the Separatists on Mustafer for the Chancellor, then he can "save her from dying in child birth" (seriously, they say that line a "little" too much for my liking) Padme can't quite get to grips with what Anakin has done, and doesn't believe the Jedi would do such a thing Anakin hasn't got time, he's got a-killing-to-be-a-doing so leaves with R2 and in his ship, he flees off for Mustafer.

We cut back to the senate, where we get a random scene with Bail Organa, who turns up and is ordered to "Return home" by the Stormtroopers, we have a random Jedi Padawan (the son of Lucas I was told later) as a pointless scene taking out stormtroopers, before he too bites the dust. Bail witnesses all this and takes off.

(If George Lucas has cut any decent MEATY scenes from this movie to put that scene in, I'll be rather annoyed.)

We cut back to Yoda, who has escaped with the wookie’s to his little ship, obviously hard to have any dialogue here, the whole Wookie thing wasn't well-thought out to be honest you really needed Threepio there to translate or something but anyway, Yoda fly’s off and we're away to Mustafer, as Anakin arrives and takes out the Separatists one by one, who have just been informed by Lord Sidious that "My new apprentice Darth Vader will be there shortly to take care of the situation" - quite cool to FINALLY hear Vader’s name spoken by Palpatine/Sidious again very nice. No Dialogue, just more Decapitations and Death, as Nute Gunray begs for his life but gets sliced in half. Anakin mugs the camera and we see his "Sith Eyes" on for the first time cool moment in the trailer cool moment now.

Back to Obi-Wan who gets a message from Bail Organa that he's picking him up, he's got Yoda onboard (who escaped the Wookie Planet) and they all meet up on the Episode IV ship - and Yoda is worried about what’s going on. Bail informs Yoda that Palpatine has made an "emergency" senate meeting to declare himself Emperor - neither suspect Anakin has anything to do with this, but as they arrive at the Jedi Temple (back on Coruscant) all is not well. The come across hundreds of dead Jedi Children, Obi-Wan says the damage was done by a lightsaber, not a blaster and as they go to "recalibrate the order 66 to save whatever Jedi are left from certain doom". (note here, and OBVIOUS illusion that not all the Jedi are going to be killed at this point even though all the high-profile movie Jedi have all had scenes of being killed even the hot-blue-twilek Aayla Secura has met her doom evidently, the Order 66 has been 'recalibrated' to save whoever is left (can anyone say TV series?). This is a pretty awful scene to be honest and now we have Obi-Wan watching a holographic recording of Anakin taking out various Jedi, and watching the whole "You will now be called Lord Vader" scene it's not nearly as good as it sounds, but Yoda saves the horrid-acting-day with a "talk with Palpatine I will" line, which alludes to the fact, he's going to kick some ass.

We FINALLY get Ewan back into acting mode, as he BEGS Yoda not to have to go find Anakin - he doesn't want to kill him, he is his brother Yoda says Palpatine is too strong, and Obi-Wan (after kicking hordes of Stormtroopers, a Droid General and half a friggin droid army) is apparently not strong enough. Well come now Yoda surely if Mace bloody Windu can best-Palpatine, you'll kick his arse right?

Obi-Wan reluctantly decides to track down Anakin, but has to figure out where he has gone he meets with Padme, but she won't tell him where Anakin has gone (basically lies, tells him she doesn't know she doesn't trust the Jedi now either)that is until Obi-Wan tells her that Anakin has turned to the dark side, he killed all the little Jedi-Kids and Padme now has the same choice Anakin had. Does she believe her "heart" which tells her Anakin is a good person, or believe the now very dodgy Jedi they seriously are made out to be an untrustworthy lot. We have a nice Senate scene, as Palpatine has recovered from his Gollumn-esque screaming, and switches back to the "Emperor" mode, declaring a new Galactic "Empire" of which he will rule, and the Jedi will all be killed, because they tried to kill him. Makes Sense.

He has some outstanding lines here Padme is there in the senate "This is how an Empire is formed, to rapturous applause" with Bail, and we then have her and Threepio leaving, as she says she's off to go and find Anakin, and find out what is going on. Obi-Wan is scene sneaking aboard Padme's ship and hides in a small space, as Padme and Threepio blast off for Mustafer.

Yoda is next, it's time for him to kick some ass once more, and he turns up and informs Palpatine, that his rule is at and end and a short one it will be. Palpatine thinks differently and owns Yoda with force lightening. Pretty brutal to be honest Yoda for the next 4 or 5 minutes is made Palpatine’s bitch, as he informs him how long he's been "waiting to kill you, my little green friend"

We cut to Padme arriving on Mustafer, and Anakin meets her, there's a bit of cheese here, as we do the 'talking heads' thing between the two a couple of horrid lines from Padme, Anakin has a ripper of a line "We can rule the Galaxy together" Padme does her "What the?!" face. Obi-Wan lets everyone know he's arrived (a nice shot of him just standing and looking at Anakin obviously unsure of what to do) Anakin thinks Padme has brought Obi-Wan here to kill him, he begins to choke her (this is where the movie hits the PG-13 portion) Obi-Wan asks him to stop, he ignites his lightsaber. Padme drops to the floor, we get a couple of nicely acted and delivered lines here from Anakin, and the battle to "apparently" end them all is on.

Back now to Yoda, who kicks back into gear, force-pushes Palpatine across the room, and gets up. Palpatine "does a Grievous" and cowardly tries to run away from Yoda, Yoda stops him at the door ignites his lightsaber, and THIS battle which DOES end them all is on and it's WAY better than the Dooku one, Yoda is no longer a jumping foot-high gimp, he's a Jedi-Master, and although doesn't really best Palpatine at any stage (which is a bit odd, considering Mace Windu had no trouble I mean, this IS Yoda) there are some cool moments, one especially as the fight on top of Palpatine’s senate pod, as it raises into the senate arena very cool moment.

Back to "The Duel" - which sorry to say isn't all I thought it would be, very static camera shots there's no dialogue it's just all action, and it's goodvery CGI heavy, but yeah, it's all a bit "meh" to be honest right up until a whole tone of lava flows over a section of the floor their fighting on, it begins to melt a HUGE lava-fall is soon approaching, so they all abandon this platform floor, and jump onto floating debris on he lava bed. Now THIS part is where it gets cool finally.

Back to Yoda, who's getting his arse kicked by Palpatine, hurling HUGE senate pods at him. There's a cool moment where Yoda spins a senate pod back at a "pretty happy with himself" Palpatine - but to no avail, as Yoda gets knocked down some more by a couple of Lightsaber blows from Palpatine, looses his lightsaber and hits the deck (loosing his Jedi garb and all) crawls off away from the Sith Lord and into I guess, some kind of wall-hovel or something.

Back to the duel, which is FINALLY living up to it's name, as we get a bit of dialogue, and Anakin and Obi-Wan fight each other on the floating lava bed this is pretty cool. Obi-Wan takes his moment to jump aboard the "land" next to the Lava river and informs Anakin "There's no use, give up I have the higher ground" (thanks for letting us know what we can see for ourselves Obi-Wan) Anakin, pissed at Obi-Wan leaps and tries to kill him, Obi-Wan slices Anakin's legs off and he hits the ground, right next to the Lava River.

Another gut wrenching moment, as Obi-Wan looks on with sorrow at the legless Anakin, who screams at Obi-Wan that he hates him. At this point, you've either brought the whole "Anakin is doing this for Padme, it's at a means to an end" or you haven’t. I guess he hates him now, because he THINKS Obi-Wan has tried to twist Padme around to his thinking (by Obi-Wan telling Padme earlier on that her husband has turned to the Dark side) - I TRUELY believe even at THIS stage, Anakin doesn't believe he has turned to the dark side. I think that’s the key - even now, he's just doing this to save Padme, he doesn't care about peace in the Galaxy, or the Jedi or Palpatine. Padme is dying, he choked her, now he has to Kill Obi-Wan, so he can get the recipe off Palpatine to save Padme. It's all about what Anakin wants.

Ewan McGregor finally gets to collect his paycheck, so he decides to act and delivers some gut wrenching lines to Anakin, who begins to catch on fire because he's slipping so close to the lava seriously, there's no cut scenes the dude IGNITES right in front of us, he begins to burn alive screams and Obi-Wan just turns his back and walks away heartless absolutely heartless.

Obi-Wan goes back to the shuttle, Threepio and R2 are there to greet him, he boards Padre’s ship, with her lying unconscious and they take off.

We cut back to the senate, where a pod-full of stormtroopers have been searching for Yoda, Palpatine orders them to keep hunting while he senses Anakin needs his help, so he gives an order to ready him a shuttle.

We cut to Yoda who gets a call from Bail Organa, Yoda jumps out of the wall he was crawling along, outside, into Bail's floating car thing informs Bail he has failed and they take off to get the hell off Coruscant.

We're back to Mustafer, as a charred and graphically scarred Anakin is struggling to crawl along the land, next to the lava river Palpatine’s shuttle turns up and we have a spine-chilling scene of Palpatine kneeling down next to the dying Anakin, and orders a life pod for him, to take him back to Coruscant.

We cross back to Obi-Wan Meeting up with the escaping Yoda and Bail in an asteroid field, as Padme lies on a table, a Medical-Robot informs us that she is dying, and they need to operate "She has lost the will to live" we're told. It's pretty gut wrenching to be honest.

We cut to Anakin, being taken off Palatine’s ship all charred and dying, still alive and being taken to Palatine’s Frankenstein-ish medical table.

We cut back to Padme on the table, dying she goes into labor (yes, we get a BIRTH acted to us in Star Wars. Christ it seems kinda weird to be honest) we cut back to Anakin, now part-Vader screaming, as he's operated on in the Frankenstein-room, this is pretty scary stuff he's still moving around on the table, in pain while they attach a new Arm and leg for him screaming and so forth. Back to Padme, who's screaming because she's having twins, they're both delivered she names them (in a fairly uncomfortable and seemingly odd way) and she tells Obi-Wan there is still good in Anakin, even now and she dies.

Back to Vader, who now is almost completed - we get another spine-chilling moment as the Iconic mask is lowered on his face, and for the FIRST time, we get an idea of what Vader's world looks like through HIS eyes, as the masks eyes (from the inside) flicker to life and it's nothing but red colored and all computer-like (hence the, "See you, with my OWN eyes" line in Episode VI)

We cut back to Padme, now on her Funeral Bed on Naboo, in a Parade full of people, we cut back to Vader rising on his Frankenstein operating table, and asks the Emperor "What happened to Padme" - Palpatine informs Vader that HE killed him, and we get a "No it's not true" from Vader (all deep voiced) Palpatine smiles, says nothing then we get unintentionally funny moment number 3, as Vader Rips his arms out of the operating table, stumbles forward Frankenstein-like, begins to force-crush everything in the room and screams an all James-Earl-Jones-voiced "Noooooooooooooo" all while Palpatine smiles evilly next to him.

It's kinda cheesy, it won't be the "Birth of Vader" moment SOME were hoping for, but there's NO other way to do a scene like that, so it's not all bad just good not great.

We cut back to Bails ship, where Yoda says they need to go into hiding, Obi-Wan agrees Yoda informs Obi-Wan that he has training from his old Master, Qui-Gon, on how to gain "Eternal life" - and will teach him how to communicate with him. Bail agrees to take Leia, Yoda tells Obi-Wan to take Luke to Anakin’s family on Tatooine and Bail gives the droids to a certain Captain aboard the ship, and as an off-the-cuff remark to Threepio, tells him to wipe his memory but R2 evidently gets to keep his.

The last line is an "Oh No" from Anthony Daniels, then we cut to Vader, Palpatine and Tarkin on the Bridge of a Star Destroyer, watching over the construction of the "Death Star" in the background, we cut to Bail arriving on his home world (Alderaan) with Leia, and he and his Wife dote over the baby girl. We cut to Tatooine, and Obi-Wan gives Baby Luke to Aunt Beru and we have a rehash of the Luke/Sunset moment in A New Hope, as Aunt Beru, and Uncle Owen stare into the Sunset, as Obi-Wan rides away and roll credits.

The End of Star Wars.

My final thoughts - If you BUY into Anakin’s reasoning for choosing Palpatine over the Jedi, (His love for Padme, and his one focus that everything he does, no matter what he had to save her) then you'll enjoy this movie .some audience members I spoke to afterwards, just didn't buy it. So they were lost from the start.

Overall, acting was about as much as you could expect there were moments (most notably the opening first 15-20minutes and the last 15-20minutes) where it was spot on from Ewan, Hayden and Co.

The whole reason why Palpatine has his raisin face, is VERY poor but I guess it works. I didn't buy that Mace could take out Palpatine so easily, and yet Yoda got owned by him so badly and I was kinda bummed that "THE Duel" was only FANTASTIC from the second half of it, the first portion was kinda "meh"

Yoda's duel with the Sith Lord Sidious is absolutely fantastic, as is the opening sequence with the rescue of Palpatine - I wanted MORE of the Kashyyyk battle but I guess MOST of all, as I've mentioned the "Jedi Purge" is just heartbreaking it's so well done. It's a 2-3min portion of the movie which is PURE Star Wars in its execution, and it's beautiful - and at the same time gutting. Anakin IS Vader at this moment, the clones ARE Stormtroopers - and the Jedi all of a sudden, can have all the Midichlorians they like, they're still screwed, because Palpatine IS the Emperor - and despite some uncomfortable moments Ian McDiarmid, steals the show both Character and acting-wise, but he's only gets that nod ahead of Yoda, because he's digital. Let’s face it though, this is Yoda's movie to shine and he does.

Overall, this is the BEST of the prequels, I have no doubt about that. It's THE most Star-Warsy of the 3 and has little to no Jar Jar, there's no Qui Gon (he'll be in the DVD I'd expect) which is sad but Obi-Wan has ALL the best lines, the humor is left to R2 D2 which is perfect, and it works really well and the Droid General is a Slimy Coward, which is so cool .but whoa, those Jedi Purge scenes are fantastic. They WILL be what this movie is remembered for, Yoda's face his reaction, Anakin and the Kids .it's heartbreaking, moving and just amazing.

PG-13 - you betcha, it's VERY graphic at the end if that’s what you're looking for, then you're going to get it. There are decapitations galore, and a cool "Oh Shit" moment with Yoda, when he takes out a whole tone of clones outside the Jedi Temple, jumping up and thrusting his lightsaber into one Stormtroopers chest!! (when they return to find out what Anakin has been up to)

This is NO Empire Strikes Back, but it is also no Matrix Reloaded/Revolutions. This is the Star Wars many have wanted, whether they LIKE how it is presented to them, is another matter. Did I like it? Absolutely is it all I expected? Absolutely.

It is what it is.

End Review.

_____________________


I'm happy to answer any questions anyone has.


Post Posted: May 5th 2005 3:38 am
 

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Thanks for the review, Biggs! It's nice to finally see an in-depth review, and not another of those "yeah, it was great, blah blah blah" ones that always infuriate us fans. We want to hear the goods!

My only question would be to the pacing. How is it overall? You said there are some slow moments in the first half, but I'd like to know how the pacing was editing-wise. AOTC has some truly horrible editing, I'd have to say. I'm hoping for more from ROTS.


Post Posted: May 5th 2005 3:42 am
 

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The Opening space battle is fantastic, the section after that is pretty hap-hazardly edited. You get a WHOLE load of scenes intercut with each other. It's very hard to track who is where now, if you know what I mean?

Which is why I think I may have a couple of scenes out of order there really is a scene change every 2 or 3 minutes right up until the Mace/Palpatine fight. It isn't good - and it's all talking-heads. There's a couple of really bad fades used too.

The last section of the movie, from after the Mace death right through until the end, is edited REALLY well together. The juxtaposition of Padme's Death to Vaders Birth is well done then the funeral and so forth. It's very well done.


Post Posted: May 5th 2005 3:46 am
 

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Speaking of the duels, you were pretty specific in terms of the Anakin/Obi-Wan duel and the Yoda/Sidious fight, but how was the Palpatine/Mace one? If there's one that gives me some worry, it's that one since it's hardly mentioned at all in any of the early reviews. Jackson even seems to be taking some heat from his performance. You'd hope that he'd at least salvage his jedi rep during his coup de grace scene.


Post Posted: May 5th 2005 3:48 am
 

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Excellent review! :chewbacca:

one thing I was wodering... does Yoda ever say "Chewbacca"? I just can't hear it in my head... :)


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Thanks for the effort on the review man.

So do we hear a Qui-Gon voice over, or we just get no reference to him at all, other than what Yoda says to Obi-wan?


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Thanks for the thorough review Biggs, the most thorough I've seen yet.

A few questions:

1) Does Anakin/Vader still kill Shaak Ti in the temple?

2) How fast does Palpatine kill Mace's escorts? Is it a single swing pretty much? Do you see their heads lopped off?

3) Do any of the Jedi fight back against the clones in the purge scene or are they basically ambushed and wasted immediately?

thx!


Post Posted: May 5th 2005 9:48 am
 

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thanks for taking the time to write that up, was great.

thanks a bunch.


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Post Posted: May 5th 2005 12:12 pm
 
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Nice review, didn't pull punches, called it as you saw it, I usually don't take fan reviews this early because of the credibility issue, but your review had me convinced me you saw it.

Do you say it was your 2nd favorite, or did I read that wrong.

My order:

ESB
ANH
ROTJ
TPM
AOTC

Here's hoping It'll at least be tied with Jedi as my third favorite.


Post Posted: May 5th 2005 12:52 pm
 
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Thanks for the review Biggs. I actually like it because you seem to just tell us what actually happen and how you saw it unlike the other reviews. I didnt really car too much if you messed up the grammer or names its not like you were getting payed for this.

But i have to agree with VT-19 I personally think Palpatine was just pretending to be weak and was actually planning on Anakin to be there. Because your right, There no way Mace is a better swords fighter than Yoda. So that has to be a reason. Palpatine all about planning an time. I mean think how long he has been waiting to kill the jedi. That takes master planning. So I believe he also was planning to see Anakin to see how Mace was trying to kill a poor senator who really could have killed him.


Post Posted: May 5th 2005 1:33 pm
 

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so Vader gets operated on without anaesthetics, in an era where light speed travel is the fucking standard?

what a joke. Still I'm sure it'll make for some haunting images...


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